Friday, June 11, 2004

Joke of the Day

A redneck farmer living along the coast of California gets rather desperate and decides to try out an old mule.

The farmer gets a ladder from the barn and puts it behind the mule. As he removes his pants, however, the mule walks forward. So, the farmer steps down from the ladder, moves it forward, and then tries again. Again, as he is removing his pants, the mule walks forward the same outcome. This happens twice more before the farmer comes up with a plan.

He steps down from the ladder and leads the mule to the ocean, so the mule can no longer walk forward.

As the farmer is climbing the ladder once again, he hears a cry for help from a woman drowning in the water. So, he jumps off the ladder, swims out to rescue her, and drags her back in.

After he revives the beautiful, nude woman and nurses her back to health, she gazes into his eyes with her limpid blue eyes, and says, "Thank you for saving my life. I am so grateful that I'll do anything to repay you!"

"Anything?" asks the farmer.

"Yes, anything!" repeats the beautiful, nude woman.

The farmer grins and says, "Could you hold that damn mule for me?"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Reagan's plane back to Los Angeles, where Nancy was waiting, didn't leave for several hours, so we kept him company. Over drinks and then dinner, Reagan never once mentioned politics. Instead he told an unending string of Irish jokes. Here is my favorite:

Two Irish ladies were at the wake for their dear friend. "Poor Mollie," said the first woman, looking down at the body, "she had such a hard life. First she married Mike, who gave her five crying children in six years. He beat her and never worked a day in his life. Then Mike up and died, and she married Johnny, who was even worse, giving her seven more children and not a penny of support. He was drunk all the time until he died, too. And now Mollie is gone, worked to death taking care of those 12 kids."

"Well, at least they are together at last," replied the second woman.

"You mean together in Heaven?" asked the first woman. "But is Mollie together with Mike or with Johnny?"

"I was referring to her legs."