Thursday, June 30, 2005

Death By Electrocution

If you haven't seen it yet, you just hafta. Don't forget to turn up your volume. It's just too funny.
Me.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Pages


Just as I was about to do a post on two pages of "interest" Rich pointed out this neat-o page that is: http://earth.google.com where you can download this awesome "3-d interface to the planet" viewer. It's similar to google maps but a little bit cooler because you can view landscapes in 3-d.

Another semi-neat page tells you what kind of person you are from what year you were born, using the music that "rocked" your year. haha. Go here and click on the "What's your sign" link on the left hand side.

One last neat-o page is for Rich (because it's funny) and for those people who want to read the bible but really wish that it came with pictures and was a more summarized version of its former self. So just click this to start you off.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

X-tians

Yesterday someone mentioned to us that it was exactly 6 months until Christmas and that brought on a few cheers and I thought to myself, "well merry X-mas to me". The next thought that came to my mind was "Merry X-mas you X-tian" and I was like, whoa, why didn't the hip people that came up with the snappy catch phrases like "generation next" come up with sayings like "hey i'm a generation x-tian" or something like that. So I was like I'm so cool coming up with that saying, so this morning I was on the pooper I pulled out my favorite brother's present to me one year, "The Pocket Encyclopedia of Aggravation" (because lord knows sometimes when you're on the pooper you're aggravated) and for some reason I found a page that I have never perused before. Yes I know, God works in mysterious ways... even on the bowl. And there, right before my eyes was an explanation of where the "X" from Merry X-mas came from. I'm sure many of you know that X was a Greek symbol for the word "chi" and Christ was known by the symbols for the words "chi" and "ro" (it looks like a "P" intercepting and "X") and in Greek Christ is known as "Xristos". So I'm late in my thinking that I am so cool with coming up with "Xtians" because in the 16th century throughout Europe the use of X to replace "Christ" spread. They even used it for words like christen =xren.

Thanks God for setting me right.
I guess I'll refer to Christopher as Xopher and Christina as Xina.
Jesus X.

Happy day! Day off tomorrow. Staying in bed all day!!!

Have a great rest of the week.
Me.


Friday, June 24, 2005

Written On My Forehead:
Deserves a good ass kicking

I am going through training right now for the new position and it is kicking my butt baaadd. It's not terribly bad but it's 9 hours straight, sitting in a frigid room, learning things in a DOS prompt system that involves "tab" "end" and memorizing lots of the function keys. uggh. It's from 8 til 5 and it takes me 45 minutes to drive over and I get up to iron my clothes, make breakfast, feed the cat, get ready for work, get everything together and then drive over (meaning I'm up at 5:30). I also don't get home til 6 or sometime around there because of the rush hour traffic and it seems like I've been working the past year for 365 days straight (when in reality it's been 5 days and first day on Sunday, so only 6 days altogether.) But I've met a few decent people who make me laugh, but I realize that to work for where I work now, you have to be really crazy. I mean you have a mental problem... what does that say about me? It fits, I think.

Yeah, sorry for not having any semi-deep blogs but I'll get there sometime, maybe Tuesday or Monday. We'll see you there and "welcome home".
It's beddy-bye time and my eyes are drooping.

Me.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Lending Library

Now that we live in a new place we decided that we should familiarize ourselves with our local library, so after cruising the dozen or so libraries, via the internet, we picked two that interested us. Then we drove over to the one downtown and I signed up for a library card. But this, my friends, is no ordinary library card. I couldn't even receive it that day. Nope, I watched as he watched me sign the card and then I watched him as he slipped it into an envelope and had me write out my address on the front, give him a secret password that they would ask me when I called in my card to activate it!! It's like a freakin' credit card.

Then I recently received it in the mail and I have yet to call it up, give my "secret password" and identify myself. That evening I watched Penn and Teller's show "Bullshit" which only confirmed what Rich had told me earlier that day, which was that he refused to sign up for a card because they (the feds) can look up what anyone has signed out at the library, under the Patriot Act. This is a quote from some person online "The theory is that people who are checking out what may be considered subversive materials are suspicious and need to be watched." If you'd like more info look up the Patriot Act section 2.15

I hope cookbooks aren't on the list of suspicious/subversive materials

Monday, June 13, 2005

"This Is Nucking Futs!!"


I am an old hispanic man's w. dream. Two cases and a half:

Every time I go through security at my place of employment (I can't mention where I work because they check up on you and by putting "their" name I'll be that more google-able... ) (and they probably don't want their employees mentioning things like this) the guard says to me, "good morning sweetie" and gives me a wink, but he happens to have an accent and it comes out more like "good morning sweaty" and I wonder if he really means the former or since in this blistering heat a walk to the building from the car makes anyone perspire Niagara, he really is more correct with the latter. I also know for a fact that he saves this phrase only for me because he never says it to the old women who walk before me.

Then the other day as I was walking to my locker an older man ahead of me stops to stare and stare at me and so I finally smiled and said "good morning!" and he asks "latina?" and I smiled again and said coyly "Filipina" (those old men like when you flirt around with them, better than being mean and cold, men are more likely to strike back harshly if you put them down) and he said, "you are beautiful" and I looked to the floor "blushingly" and said daintily "thank you" and he says "berry berry beautiful," and then I said laughingly "oh you, just tell that to my husband" (you gotta let em down easy) and he says "you're husband is a berry lucky man, not everyone gets a berry beautiful wife." Then I started laughing and went back to putting things away in my locker.

And I always get the longer than necessary looks and good mornings from the crew that work here.

I swear that in the Aztec, Incan or Mayan jungles, one day when I am on trip to look at them (their structures), I will stumble upon a statue that looks exactly like me. There is a Mayan/Aztec/Incan goddess that bears a striking resemblance to me. Beautiful, brown, big-cheeked and shiny from the dew... or sweat.

Have a berry nice rest of the week.
Me.

P.S. My big cheeks work on small children as well. Strange kids will flock to me just to say hello and stare at my big-cheeked brilliance. Ah-me that's the life of a celebrity. hehe.

Friday, June 10, 2005

"I will cause it to rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights"

Toadstools have popped up in our backyard, lovely little snow capped bunches that look as if they were edible that I was tempted to squat down beside the guava bush and pick at one and delight in its imagined sugary, powdery-textured sweetness. But of course I was reminded by some guardian angel that toadstools were poisonous and not to ingest them if I could help myself.

I'm not sure whether rains bring on toadstool, but it is something I will have to look up. Aha, I just looked it up and it (by "it" I mean rain) does bring about toadstools/mushrooms/fungi. As some of you may not know it's rainy season here in Florida, but not only that, we've got a full blown tropical storm making it's way up here. Yup, tropical storm Arlene. Thanks leeny. That should make my drive tomorrow something of an adventure. yay.

The rain makes me drowsy and the humidity makes me grumpy. Imagine going for a 15 minutes jog around the block only to return home slathered in sweat and having the impossible task of drying off when it's like 100% humidity. It takes forever to dry one's hair after a shower as well. Yuck yuck yuck. Well gotta go dry off, all this typing has made me sweat up a storm... on the good side, maybe I'll lose some water weight. Any weightloss is good weightloss. hehe.

Stay safe and dry folks and have a nice weekend all.

Me.

Monday, June 06, 2005

Whoa, June already?

I was going to write an end of May "farewell" adding that the beginning of May (the first ten days) is Asian/Pacific American Heritage celebration, and being full of my Asian/Pacific Islander pride... well I celebrated it quietly this year. And in honor of that my family has gone back to the native ground and celebrated with family and friends. Well maybe they didn't go home because of that, I don't think so anyway, but it coincided so I figured I'd throw it in there.

I've been in Florida for exactly 2 months and 4 days... seems longer, and I have yet to taste some decent southern fried chicken. I almost succumbed to the temptation of the KFC several times, and I did eat "fried chicken" from our local grocery store, gross, I know, and it was. Too salty, too greasy and I had to fry it again to get it to that crispy texture I like so much. So every circular that comes around, or commercial, I keep an ear and eye out for any mention for fried chicken. I'm in search of the elusive fried chicken. I can make some decent goods on my own but just the thought of all the work that goes into that, especially in this heat and humidity, makes me sick.

I've been married exactly 3 months and 4 days... seems longer, and I have yet to plan and look into the big wedding. I know several people who would be disappointed if it didn't get done... not counting myself. Eh, so tired. I think I'm getting sick again. I thought I had some good immunity but guess not. Not counting the last and most recent sickness the last time I was sick was several years ago. Stupid Florida and it's damp heat, air conditioned-recirculated air, stuffy buildings and tourists from god knows where, with their foreign sicknesses. It could just be a slight allergy thing but I wont go into details at what I had to hack up this morning and reach in and try to extract from the back of my throat. (Just to let you know it was hard to pull out and gave me the fight of my life, that's right, it was an alien baby pod lodged in there.)

Disgusting. I learned from being a newlywed that my husband, yes girls, take out a paper and pen and jot this down, that men don't want their wives to be disgusting in any repects. I think I've had more talks with Rich, now that we're married, about my burping and other unladylike behavior...
He sure didn't mind "hitting" my "stinky ass" when we weren't married.

I don't need your comments buddy.

Get going and keep walking.
Me.